Bridesmaidzilla Strikes Again

Remember Rosie, Gabby’s new sister-in-law and bridesmaid from hell?  She was a pain in the butt before and during the wedding.  My blood starts to boil every time I think about her in the bridal suite sitting in the corner making phone calls to plan her own wedding and not saying a word to anyone else…all while wearing her future mrs whatever hoodie. 

Well, the wedding is off.  Turns out Rosie McSlut found herself a new guy and started sleeping with him while she was still engaged and spending 40 hours a week wedding planning.  (Rosie actually told her mom that’s how much planning she was doing….either she’s a complete moron or entirely too inefficeint with her time.)  So, the wedding is off.  But, she instructed her mom to tell people that it’s just on hold.  Right.  She spent Thanksgiving with the new guy.  I think she just wants to keep the ring and pawn it for cash.

The timing of her engagement (about three weeks before Gabby’s wedding) and her antics during the wedding weekend always made me wonder if she wanted to be engaged at her brother’s wedding for some reason.  Well, now I know she did. 

Good luck to the new guy…I wonder if he has any idea just what type of person he’s getting involved with.

Adele’s Surprise Shower

Adele is getting married in three weeks!  Yesterday, we threw her a surprise shower at work.  Well, it was actually at a bar and restaurant during work hours, but it was all work people there, so it counted as work

It was my job to get her there…my plan was to act like I was having a bad day (not a hard thing to do any more with all of the insane reogranization stuff going on) and tell her I needed Starbucks.  Then, at the last minute I would decide that no…I needed a real drink and tell her to stop in the Union Grill with me.

Well, I was beyond excited about her surprise and couldn’t must up a “i hate work” act.  I was in too good of a mood!  (Seriously, that should have tipped her off right there!) So, we met and actually did work for about 15 minutes, and then I just interuppted and said that I needed Starbucks. 

The best part about the walk down Craig St was that Adele was telling me all about how great her fiance has been…it was so sweet.  She was going on and on about it – in a very cute way – so as we got to the Union Grill door, I literally just had to grab her arm and pull her in.  She followed me in with ease.

And waiting inside were about twelve of our coworkers.  Adele was surprised, and I think it was a really fun afternoon.  Now, I just can’t wait until the wedding!!!

Bridesmaidzilla: An update

Gabby’s wedding was amazing. She was beyond beautiful, and I’ve never seen her happier. However, the day wasn’t without drama.

Rosie, our Bridesmaidzilla, apparently saved her best tacky behavior for the day of Gabby’s wedding. She was beyond rude…and we weren’t the only people who noticed or thought her behavior was entirely inappropriate.

She showed up to the salon after scoping reception sites. She sat next to Gabby and told her and Sean the hairdresser about the places she’s seen so far and what she thinks about each of them. She went on and on and on to the point when Sean whispered to me, “Is she ever going to stop?”

Later when Sean was doing my hair and Rosie was off demanding to have her hair washed, he told me he was in disbelief over how self-centered Rosie was…what could I do but just agree with him?

Back at the hotel, Gabby had a suite for us to get ready in – the makeup artist was there, so was Gabby’s older sister who was doing the flower girls’ hair. People were in and out of the suite, and we were all hanging out, having a great time, and making sure Gabby had everything and any help she needed.

Everyone but Rosie, that is. Rosie sat on the chair in the corner by herself, with her wedding magazines and notebook, and called wedding vendors for approximately two hours. She never once asked Gabby if there was anything she needed. She never once tried to talk to anyone…she was too busy.

When I was getting my makeup done, she was right behind me, on the phone constantly asking about dates available and fees and then calling her friend to tell her what she discovered. My blood was boiling. It took every ounce of energy I had to stop from turning around and telling her off. The lady doing our makeup kept asking me if she was really doing that and kept shaking her head in disbelief.

Then, it was Rosie’s turn for makeup. And that’s when I noticed the hoodie she had put on...complete with embroidery that said “The Future Mrs. Summers.” I think my jaw, along with everyone else’s, hit the floor. The girl has been engaged for about a month – what did she do, have it express ordered so she could wear it to her future sister in law’s wedding???

I really, really wanted to walk up to her and calmly say, “Rosie, I hope that next summer when you’re getting ready for your wedding, that one of your bridesmaids doesn’t sit in the corner and plan her own wedding or otherwise think that your wedding day is about anyone else but you.”

But I didn’t. I avoid conflict and didn’t want to cause any more tension than there already was.  Plus, she’s so self-absorbed, she probably wouldn’t even get the message.

Rosie may have been a bitch and caused a little drama while we were getting ready, but we definitely didn’t let her spoil Gabby’s wedding day. The way I see it, she’s the one that missed out on tons of fun with people who love and care about Gabby.

Congratulations, Gabs!!!!!!!!!!

Bridesmaidzilla

One of my best friends is getting married on Saturday.  I’m her maid of honor, and if you’re to believe all of the Hollywood stereotypes about brides, that would mean I’m right in the middle of hell.  Lucky for me, that’s so not the case.  Gabby, who I’ve known since sixth grade and who sometimes feels like my other half, is the model bride-to-be.

 Don’t believe me?  Well, let me put it this way…we picked the bridesmaid dresses and can wear any silver strappy shoes we want.  So far, her biggest demand on us has been asking if we want to get a mani/pedi with her Friday afternoon – who doesn’t want to do that – any day of the week?!  Sure we helped with the shower and bachelorette party – although, her mom basically took care of everything having to do with the shower – but those are fun when it’s for one of your closest friends. 

 Gabby is no Bridezilla.  And, thank god because we’re dealing with something much worse…a Bridesmaidzilla.

 I don’t know if this girl – who we’ll refer to as Rosie – is just totally self absorbed, clueless or both, but for the past few months, she’s been nothing short of a nightmare.  And, the worst part is, most of her absurdity has been though direct contact with Gabby.

 A little background on Gabby – she’s currently getting her PhD in psychology, teaching psychology classes, and planning a wedding for over 300 people.  This week – her wedding week – she has a presentation to give and a test to take, not to mention keeping up with her reading and everything else that PhD students need to do.  She is probably one of the busiest people I know without wedding planning thrown into the mix.  So, you can imagine what her life has been like lately. 

Enter Rosie.  Rosie, Gabby’s soon-to-be sister in law, just got engaged herself.  (I’m convinced she timed it perfectly to try and steal Gabby’s thunder, but that’s another story.)  Now, I’ve never been engaged before, but I’m sure it’s a really exciting time and all you want to do is start planning your big day.  There’s nothing wrong with that.  There is something wrong with bombarding your future sister in law with stupid reception and church choosing questions two weeks before her own wedding.  Rosie, do you really think Gabby has the time to re-hash her own experiences with different reception venues around Pittsburgh?  Or tell you what churches require in terms of bringing your own officiant and payment?  My guess is that they’d all be different, so pick up the phone and find out yourself!

Maybe Rosie’s recent harassments wouldn’t have been so bad if she’d actually done a damn thing for Gabby or her wedding up until this point.  But, she hasn’t.  She even had the gall to ask Gabby to drive 45 minutes to the bridal store to pick up her bridesmaid dress when it came in.  Um, the store will ship it to you, Rosie.  And of course Gabby had to pay the balance on the dress and then argue with Rosie that yes in fact there was a balance.

 Rosie couldn’t come to the shower or bachelorette party because she had a wedding to attend.  Again, very understandable, but do you think she offered once to do anything to help with either event?  Nope!  She did have champagne sent to the table at the bachelorette party dinner, but that was after I nixed her hiring a singing ape to show up at one of the South Side’s trendiest restaurants. 

 Has she ever offered to help with anything else for the wedding?  Again, no!  That’s basically the role of a bridesmaid – to help the bride with anything possible.  Rosie just makes things more difficult.  When Gabby needed to know if she wanted to wear her hair up or down – the salon needed to know – Rosie refused to give a definite answer, but did request that Gabby double and triple check with the salon that they’d be able to wash her hair.  Hello – can’t you just wash your own hair that morning when you take a shower?  

 The real kicker with Rosie has been her flat out refusal to get manis and pedis with the rest of us on Friday.  She also will be late to the salon Saturday morning.  Her reason?  She needs to go scope out reception sites while she’s in town. 

Someone needs to tell Rosie that this weekend is Gabby’s (and Rosie’s brother) wedding.  I’m afraid after a few drinks this weekend, that person may be me.  Hopefully, it won’t get too ugly.